Greatest Love

Maybe they are already there.....

Maybe they are already there…..

I have often wondered what it was that couples that managed to stay in love with one another till one of them dies of old age had that mere mortals didn’t. You know the kind; they walk hand in hand to cross the street even when they 70, when they are together, they are totally wrapped up in each other that the rest of the world might as well not exist. And when they see each other after even a few minutes apart, their eyes light up. To each of them, the other is as beautiful or handsome as the day they met because when they look at each other, the wrinkles and the grey doesn’t register. It is a rare and wondrous kind of love.

How did these couples find that “us” place where the individual “mes” didn’t exist. In other words how did they relinquish their egos and gave up being right, or looking good or winning and instead find joy in giving to the other person. Us mere mortals get our backs up the moment the other person says the slightest thing that might make us look weak or bad or wrong. Or we find it necessary to point out every deficiency or fault many many times over when none of it matters the slightest in the long run. Being right takes precedence over being kind. Every opportunity to score a point is grabbed with enthusiasm. The littlest transgression is pounced on gleefully. We lie and cheat and then cover it up knowing full well that what we did would hurt the other person. We see parts of the relationship that are failing, and instead of putting in more effort to keep it going, we withdraw in order to lessen the hurt to ourselves. A combination of anger and hurt spill over into every moment because we are responding from a place of past hurts instead of to the person in front of us. We take words at face value letting them cause us offense rather than look deeper and understand why it was said. In the end we simply stop listening after the first word or two and jump with ease into yet another argument.

What we forget is that none of this is necessary. We love them and they love us. Their eyes light up when they see us even when when it’s only been 5 minutes since you left to go to the bathroom leaving them to hold your coat. When you look into their eyes the rest of the world doesn’t exist. And when you feel their love, all seems right with the world and you no longer feel alone and lost. And if you carried on being that way, you might very well be crossing the street holding hands when you are 70. The couples that do make it that far know not to let the mundane and everyday distract them from each other. They always put the other person first and know what it is they would lose if they let their ego take precedence. They put a lot of work into nurturing their love from budling stage through to full maturity. But most of all they know they are both fighting for the same side and so make sure that neither of them get killed by friendly fire……

It's a journey

It’s a journey

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