Time and time again, I have heard the following words; but understood little about what it meant….”things that bug you about other people are more to do with you than about them”…But two weeks ago, someone explained them to me in a slightly different manner and finally the penny dropped.
I attended a session of the spiritual group I had been a part of for the last 18 months or so. It was titled “the joy of conscious breath”. I wasn’t initially sure I would learn anything from it, but the Englishman was interested, so we went. It was run by Janine Seymour, a practitioner of the ancient arts including sound healing and alchemy. On her website which you can access to the link on her name above, describes her as a “Spirit Medicine Woman”.
After the introductory session, I attended a personal one on one session with her and can attest to her healing powers personally. But that was not what I wanted to write about. During that initial talk, she asked us all to list out the characteristics of the people we admired and held in high regard. Then she asked us to list out a few characteristics that bugged us about people who “push our buttons”. The first list was according to her who we really were and our positive characteristics. That which we admire in others is what we hold and value in ourselves. And the second list she said were things that we found as faults in ourselves. I listed out “angry, inflexible, unreasonable, unfair and dishonest. Upon reading that she asked me what it was about myself that I was angry about lying to myself thereby being inflexible, unreasonable and unfair to myself. During the individual session, she dissected this further to events that happened long long ago in my life which made me feel like I was unworthy of being loved. As part of her healing practice, she assists in bringing back those parts of ourselves that we become detached from for one reason or another and strive to complete us. It is an interesting and frankly fascinating way of looking at ourselves and seeing why we react the way we do to other people.
Janine did make the distinction that the things we disliked in a calm and rational manner about other people were about them and not us. It is only the things that cause us great upset when we come across them. But good or bad, the things that we admire or reject strongly in others are facets of ourselves that are important to recognise in the journey of self discovery. Other people are merely mirrors to see ourselves in and if we are aware enough and clever enough, we can use it to grow…….