I slept through the night and woke up feeling really good. Over the last three days I have progressively rid my house of all things to do with the Englishman. Yesterday I chanted the Loving Kindness Sutra and placed Reiki symbols all over my house. The change in energy is palpable. There is a calmness everywhere. I do not want negativity in my life. We all have those dark moments in our lives, but there is no point in taking on someone else’s darkness and adding to your own. I thought if I gave out enough light, he would eventually have more light moments than dark. And for the large part, that was the case. But his darkness was slowly infecting me. And I could no longer see a purpose for what I was doing. One thing he consistently said from the beginning is that he was better on his own. For over a year I argued back saying how much better his life was in a relationship. But lately, I started saying to him, if I have to justify to you why you need to be in a relationship, then there is something seriously wrong with “us”. I have finally seen the truth. You can only bring someone into the light if they want to come out of the darkness. If they are determined stay there, then you are only wasting your time.