5 Years On and Thriving

It has been 5 years since my ex husband moved out of our home. The marriage broke up a year and a half before that, but he only moved out on Labour Weekend of 2009. I wanted to do a then and now post, about how much has changed in my life over those 5 years and thought it would be really good to find a picture of me around that time. I have looked through two computer’s worth of photos and the closest I can find is a picture from Jacob’s birthday party in early July 2009.

Pics from Shane 085

The sad reality was there was no one to take pictures of me…I was very dependant on my husband for the heavy jobs around the house, could barely drive, had no concept of who I was and what mattered to me in life above and beyond my family, had very low self esteem, found it hard to say no to people and basically ran myself ragged trying to please anyone and everyone. I didn’t understand the importance of valuing myself and being happy. Everything I was existed outside of me.

Five years on, I am glad to say I have found myself. I know who I am and what is important to me. I no longer look for happiness outside of myself. I have mastered driving and can look after my house and Jacob’s needs. I have learned to say “no” and stop trying to please people because I can handle their disappointment if I don’t please them all the time. I have learned to value myself and do things that matter to me.

It didn’t happen overnight. Infact, if you are a regular reader of my blog, you will know it has been a long slow and sometimes painful journey. But I have grown tremendously and feel capable of dealing with anything life might throw at me. One of my favourite quotes is:

I have survived 100% of the bad days so far; chances are I will survive the rest

Above all, I have learned to be grateful for all that I have in my life today..Jacob, my cats, good friends, this blog, my spiritual practice and for the mere fact I am still alive.


4 Comments Add yours

  1. As the saying goes, “you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.” Great ending to this post. That shows your strength and as I read it, acceptance and thankfulness of what you have in front of you. Blessings to you and Jacob, the cats and your loved ones. Have a happy day. Sending you smiles. 🙂 🙂

    1. Thank you my friend..You are so right..Being strong is the only choice we do have. Hope you are having a lovely weekend and look forward to catching up soon. Much love.

  2. Dodie says:

    I see your eyes open and alive to what surrounds you. I see the way you express yourself so simply and straightforward. Thriving seems inevitable with that kinda viewpoint. Here’s to the next 5!

    1. Thank you. Funny isn’t it, when we are going through such experiences we think we are experiencing failure; but in hindsight it is all a journey and a successful one at that…

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